How to date during a pandemic when you ARE vaccinated

For most of us that are single, the pandemic has been an isolating experience. Humans are social creatures; we need to touch and be touched.  We like to be flirted with and like to flirt. We like getting to know what makes other people ‘tick’ and sharing elements about ourselves. We need to feel a connection and know that we are loved and cared for by other humans. During the pandemic we missed teasing that part of our brain with all the possibilities of what happens when we date and create romantic connections. 

In the United States we had the opportunity to get the COVID-19 vaccine this past spring. For many, it wasn’t a moment too soon. The vaccination was the antidote for loneliness. We felt like the veil was lifted and it was safe to date in person again if both people were vaccinated. We began to meet, eat and drink together with friends and perfect strangers. We flirted, kissed, and became intimate. Then that opened window shut back down again in late July when the Delta variant came crashing down on us. 

The highly contagious Delta variant is the latest strain of the coronavirus that can be contracted by both those vaccinated and unvaccinated. Among the vaccinated, or break through cases, the Delta variant symptoms are less severe, and the infection period is shorter. The Center for Disease Control states that unvaccinated people are at a higher risk of contracting the variant, have a longer infection period, and symptoms are more severe and may result in hospitalization or death. The Delta variant has an” R Naught” rating, the number of people likely to become infected by an infected person, between 6 and 7. Covid-19’s R Naught rating is 2-3, while the highly contagious chicken pox is 10-12. 

Thoughts and Behaviors. We are rounding a month plus of the Delta variant in the US and are continuing to see cases rise across the country. From a public health standpoint, it’s not enough to say, “I’m vaccinated” when you are dating in person.  So, what is “enough”?  How do we date during a pandemic when we are vaccinated but you're not protected from variant strains?

The real answer is to learn about people’s attitudes and day-to-day behaviors. It’s important to learn how people feel about their role to stop the spread. It’s important to know how people feel about adhering to the CDC’s COVID safety guidelines. Learning these two things are a good predictor of their behaviors. People who are vaccinated may feel safe from getting the variant and “kind of over it”, which means they may not wear their mask when they should, not be diligent on handwashing nor social distancing. In other words, their behaviors are putting them at an increased risk of getting the Delta variant. On the other hand, if they are vaccinated and continue to follow CDC guidelines, this lessens their chance of becoming a breakthrough case.

Because vaccinated people are getting milder symptoms when they contract the Delta variant it may be easily missed. Symptoms mirror that of a cold or allergy: mild headaches, sneezing, dry cough. Vaccinated people can have the Delta variant and not know it and spread the virus to people who are vaccinated and unvaccinated alike. The increased contagiousness and rising infection rates has put us on alert to check out those symptoms and not assume that they are a cold or allergies. 

Dating Breakthrough Cases According to the CDC recommendations, people testing positive for COVID (Delta variant include) are expected to quarantine for 10 days and don't recommend getting re-tested. This means, people that test positive for COVID can go out on a date on day 11; that’s it. For some, this seems awfully dicey.  We know that people can test positive for COVID for another 20 days after quarantine, but they no longer are contagious after the 10-day quarantine. Yet for some, it seems perfectly reasonable to ask to see a negative test before going out on a date.

The vaccinated (assuming they trust the science behind the vaccine) are at a crossroads of believing in science but airing on the side of caution, even if it means going against the science. We are now conditioned to carry a bit of paranoia around with us because of how much we don’t know. While we are swimming in an abyss of uncertainty, and as a result are making up some of our own rules to feel comfortable. So how do we date once someone has become a breakthrough case? 

Stay with the science but listen to your gut. Date people that continue to abide by the CDC guidelines as stated above. Continue to avoid larger crowds- indoor and outdoor venues alike. When possible, dine in outdoor areas or indoor uncrowded places where staff are masked. Avoid bars where patrons are seated closer together and are maskless.